Book Review: ‘Mattering’ by Jennifer Wallace and Why Feeling Valued Is Essential to Well-Being

‘Mattering’ by Jennifer Wallace explains the mental health crisis we’re living in. Photo: Penguin Random House

Related Post: What It Means to Matter and Why It’s Essential for a Meaningful Life

Book Review: Mattering by Jennifer Wallace

In Mattering: The Secret to a Life of Deep Connection and Purpose, Jennifer Wallace delivers a profound and timely wake-up call. She argues that today’s mental health crisis isn’t simply the result of digital burnout or political strife, but a symptom of something deeper: what she calls an “erosion of mattering.”

Drawing on psychology, sociology, and real-world stories, Wallace makes a compelling case that mattering—knowing we are valued and that our contributions have meaning—is not a luxury. It is a basic human need, as essential as food or water. When that need goes unmet, the consequences ripple outward, fueling anxiety, depression, loneliness, and social fragmentation.


What’s Inside the Book

Wallace explores mattering through a series of thoughtful, accessible chapters, including:

  • Connect to Your Impact
  • The Good Kind of Weight
  • Mattering Too Much
  • Everyone Needs (to Be) a Cornerman
  • Tuning In
  • When the Rug Gets Pulled: Coping with Life’s Transitions
  • How We Spend Our Days: Mattering at Work
  • Be an Architect: Mattering Spaces

Key Highlights

Chapter 2: The Good Kind of Weight

This chapter focuses on using our strengths to meet the needs around us. Wallace emphasizes the importance of asking, rather than assuming, what others need. As she writes, “To add value, find a need in the world and apply your strengths.” Sometimes, mattering starts with the simple but courageous question: “What can I do to help?”

Chapter 3: Mattering Too Much

While feeling needed is essential, Wallace warns against imbalance. When we prioritize others at the expense of ourselves, the weight of responsibility can become crushing. “By treating yourself as a priority,” she notes, “you also create space for the relationships in your life to become more authentic.”


The Mattering Core

The focus is Wallace’s “mattering core,” a framework built on four essential pillars:

  • Recognition: Seeing and acknowledging your own impact
  • Reliance: Being needed by others—in healthy balance
  • Prioritization: Feeling like a priority to those who matter most
  • Investment: Being truly known and supported

Through stories of grieving individuals, exhausted caregivers, and everyday people quietly struggling, Wallace shows how the absence of mattering can dismantle one’s sense of self.


Final Thoughts

Warm, humane, and deeply practical, Mattering doesn’t just diagnose a societal ill, it offers a roadmap forward. Wallace shows how small, intentional acts of recognition and care can rebuild connection in families, schools, workplaces, and communities.

Clear-eyed yet hopeful, Mattering challenges readers to rethink success, connection, and what it truly means to live well, together. It’s a must-read for anyone feeling lost in the shuffle of modern life.

“We live in a time marked by division across politics, race, gender, and class. But gaps don’t close through argument. They narrow from feeling heard or being seen.”

Rating: 4 out of 5.

*Thank you to Angela Baggetta Communications for the gifted copy for review consideration. I haven’t been compensated for this review and all views and opinions expressed are my own.

What It Means to Matter and Why It’s Essential for a Meaningful Life

Mattering is the new book by Jennifer Wallace. Photo: Penguin Random House

We live in a world more connected than ever, yet more people feel invisible, replaceable, and disconnected from purpose than at any other time in recent history.

📚 New Book Spotlight

Mattering: The Secret to a Life of Deep Connection and Purpose

by Jennifer Breheny Wallace

From award-winning journalist and bestselling author Jennifer Wallace comes Mattering, a timely and transformative book that confronts the loneliness, burnout, and loss of purpose so many people are experiencing today. (Penguin Random House, 2025)

📅 Release date: Tuesday, January 27
📘 Status: Available now for pre-order


Why Mattering Matters

In this groundbreaking work, Wallace makes a powerful and urgent case: mattering—the feeling that we are valued and that we have an opportunity to add value—is a core human need, as essential to our well-being as food and water.

Yet in today’s world, this fundamental need is increasingly unmet, with serious consequences. As mental and social health crises continue to surge, we often point to social media, the pace of modern life, or polarizing politics as the cause. Wallace argues that beneath these forces lies a deeper issue, what she calls “an erosion of mattering.”


Stories, Science, and the Cost of Feeling Invisible

With her signature warmth and insight, Wallace weaves together compelling research and deeply moving stories of mattering lost and regained. She introduces readers to:

  • Burned-out employees
  • Overwhelmed caregivers
  • People navigating grief
  • Individuals facing destabilizing life transitions

Through these stories, Mattering shows how lives are transformed when people are reminded, often in small but intentional ways, that they are valued and that their presence and contributions truly count.


The “Mattering Core”

At the heart of the book is what Wallace calls the mattering core, made up of four essential elements:

  • Recognizing your impact
  • Being relied on (but not too much)
  • Feeling prioritized
  • Being truly known and invested in

Strengthening this core helps us reconnect with purpose, deepen our relationships, and face uncertainty with greater resilience and clarity.


Who This Book Is For

Perfect for readers of Brené Brown, David Brooks, and Adam Grant, Mattering is a rare, culture-shifting book that offers a diagnosis and a remedy. With a clear roadmap and actionable takeaways, Wallace shows how to:

  • Unlock mattering within ourselves
  • Build cultures of mattering in our homes
  • Create healthier, more connected workplaces
  • Strengthen communities that support belonging

Mattering is a call to action and a blueprint for living a meaningful life and for creating the world we so urgently need.


About the Author

Jennifer Wallace is an award-winning journalist and author of the New York Times bestselling book Never Enough: When Achievement Culture Becomes Toxic—and What We Can Do About It, named an Amazon Best Book of the Year.

Her work has appeared in The Wall Street Journal and The Washington Post. A graduate of Harvard College, Wallace began her journalism career in television at 60 Minutes.



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