Memoirs offer a unique and personal perspective on life, drawing readers into the intimate experiences of an individual’s journey. Unlike autobiographies, which often focus on public achievements, memoirs highlight specific moments, emotions, and reflections, making them more relatable and human. Their appeal lies in their authenticity and vulnerability, allowing readers to connect with the author’s struggles, triumphs, and growth. They offer a sense of shared experience and a reminder of our common humanity, sparking empathy and introspection in readers.

“Jeddah Bride” is a new memoir out this month by Patricia Bonis that recounts her experiences with Rahman Abbar, a man from Saudi Arabia.

Patricia Bonis runs her own interior design firm and has designed the homes, offices, and embassies of CEOs, ambassadors, and international financiers for over 30 years. She has an equally long standing and passionate career as an equestrian, actively competing in the World Equestrian Festival, the Hampton Classic, and numerous other horse shows across America. Her first book is “Jeddah Bride,” a memoir about a smart, free-spirited girl who fell in love with Rahman Abbar, son of a wealthy Saudi Arabian family

Synopsis:

“Jeddah Bride” – When Rahman suggested they marry, it was the happiest day of her life. But Patricia was not prepared for life as a Saudi woman-a life spent looking through curtains and veils at the world outside, a life that of necessity was curtailed and protected from the toxic masculinity of the culture, a life that, for an American girl used to sneaking out and hitchhiking, was dangerous and frightening and foreign. She was not prepared to give up all her freedom: freedom to drive herself, to go where she wanted when she wanted, to read books and listen to music she wanted, even to give up making a career for herself. (Meryl Moss Media, 2024)

After years in Jeddah, Patricia and Rahman moved to America, where Patricia gave birth to two children and started her own successful career. She thought their family was complete and that they would stay in America to raise their children in freedom and security.

Until Rahman starts talking about leaving America and moving back into the jet-set lifestyle-regardless of Patricia’s needs and wishes. After previous disappointments, Patricia is ready to divorce him and strike out on her own. But she is not ready for her children to be kidnapped.

Review:

The story begins in 2002 as Patricia is reuniting with Karim, her oldest son, after fourteen harrowing years of looking for him. He was just a boy when their father took him and his sister Sultana out of the United States during a court appointed visitation. She tracks down Karim and introduces herself to a grown man and proceeds to attempt to get back into his and Sultana’s life.

From there, it goes back to the 70s when a young Patricia meets Rahman while out partying one night. She is instantly drawn to his magnetic personality and exotic good looks and finds it impossible to resist the fast life filled with parties, money, and connections. But not everything that shines is gold, and when she makes a trip to Jeddah to meet his family, she is introduced to a world that she had only heard about. Despite the culture shock, she continues the relationship but the years ahead will alter her life in ways she could have never seen coming.

In “Jeddah Bride,” Patricia Bonis offers a deeply personal and poignant memoir that chronicles her life as an American woman married to a Saudi man. The book captures her journey of navigating cultural divides, familial expectations, and her evolving identity while living in Saudi Arabia.

The narrative is introspective and engaging, providing readers with a window into the complexities of cross-cultural marriage and the challenges of living in a society with strict cultural norms. She contrasts the freedom of her American upbringing with the constraints of Saudi society, particularly as she experiences the difficulties of life in Jeddah. Her honesty about the emotional and personal sacrifices required to integrate into her husband’s world is compelling, yet she never shies away from addressing the difficulties and moments of isolation she faced.

The language is down to earth and even though there are some tense moments, the tone doesn’t get too dark and depressing. Since the focus is on her early experiences, the chapters on her divorce and custody battles are brief and towards the end.

Overall, “Jeddah Bride” is an honest portrayal of marriage and culture clash as well as an exploration of identity and belonging. It’s an insightful and heartfelt memoir that will resonate with readers intrested in the complexities of cross-cultural relationships, making it a thought-provoking read for those curious about the nuances of love, tradition, and change. A fast and easy read, it is recommended for fans of women’s memoirs.

“Never wavering in my efforts to reach my children in Saudi, I did attempt to rebuild my life. I had no choice. Fourteen years is a very long time and I needed to soothe the ever present pain in my heart.”

*The author received a copy of this book for an honest review. The views and opinions expressed here belong solely to her.